I just saw this posted elsewhere. I thought it was cute and wanted to share it with you.
**************
We all know those little computer symbols called 'emoticons,' where:
:) means a smile and
:( is a frown.
Sometimes these are represented by
:-)
:-(
Well, how about some 'ASSICONS?'
Here it goes:
(_!_) a regular ass
(__!__) a fat ass
(!) a tight ass
(_*_) a sore ass
{_!_} a swishy ass
(_o_) an ass that's been around
(_x_) kiss my ass
(_X_) leave my ass alone
(_zzz_) a tired ass
(_E=mc2_) a smart ass
(_$_) Money coming out of his ass
(_?_) Dumb Ass
You have just been e-mooned!
Wednesday, November 07, 2007
Monday, October 08, 2007
Thanksgiving, Thanksliving
Happy Thanksgiving to you all. On this day, I give thanks for the following things:
God bless you all and thank you for being my friend.
- For the noise around me that means I can hear.
- For the daylight and dark, which means I can see.
- For fresh air because it means I am alive and breathing.
- For a roof over my head.
- For food on my table.
- For clothes on my back.
- For a car to take me where I need to go.
- For public transit to take me to work and back each day.
- For my job because it means I can earn a living and have a direct affect on many thousands of teachers and students in our province.
- For friends who are there for me when I need them.
- For my children, who will hopefully be there for me one day as I grow old.
- For the rain in my life because it means I will later appreciate the rainbow.
- For the winters that come because it means I will appreciate a warmer spring.
- For the beautiful colours of fall because it means I am not colour-blind.
God bless you all and thank you for being my friend.
Monday, September 10, 2007
So Incredibly Sad ... So Unfortunately True
I don't know if this is an actual happening, but it accurately states what we here in Canada also now face. I believe it is a sad state of affairs.
Tennessee Football Game
This is a statement that was read over the PA system at the football game at Roane County High School, Kingston, Tennessee, by school Principal, Jody McLeod.
"It has always been the custom at Roane County High School football games, to say a prayer and play the National Anthem, to honor God and Country."
Due to a recent ruling by the Supreme Court, I am told that saying a Prayer is a violation of Federal Case Law. As I understand the law at this time, I can use this public facility to approve of sexual perversion and call it "an alternate lifestyle," and if someone is offended, that's OK.
I can use it to condone sexual promiscuity, by dispensing condoms and calling it, "safe sex." If someone is offended, that's OK.
I can even use this public facility to present the merits of killing an unborn baby as a "viable means of birth control." If someone is offended, no problem ...
I can designate a school day as "Earth Day" and involve students in activities to worship religiously and praise the goddess "Mother Earth" and call it "ecology."
I can use literature, videos and presentations in the classroom that depicts people with strong, traditional Christian convictions as "simple minded" and "ignorant" and call it "enlightenment."
However, if anyone uses this facility to honor GOD and to ask HIM to Bless this event with safety and good sportsmanship, then Federal Case Law is violated.
This appears to be inconsistent at best, and at worst, diabolical Apparently, we are to be tolerant of everything and anyone, except GOD and HIS Commandments.
Nevertheless, as a school principal, I frequently ask staff and students to abide by rules with which they do not necessarily agree. For me to do otherwise would be inconsistent at best, and at worst, hypocritical... I suffer from that affliction enough unintentionally. I certainly do not need to add an intentional transgression.
For this reason, I shall "Render unto Caesar that which is Caesar's," and refrain from praying at this time.
"However, if you feel inspired to honor, praise and thank GOD and ask HIM, in the name of JESUS, to Bless this event, please feel free to do so. As far as I know, that's not against the law—yet."
One by one, the people in the stands bowed their heads, held hands with one another and began to pray. They prayed in the stands. They prayed in the team huddles. They prayed at the concession stand and they prayed in the Announcer's Box!
The only place they didn't pray was in the Supreme Court of the United States of America—the Seat of "Justice" in the "one nation, under GOD."
Somehow, Kingston, Tennessee Remembered what so many have forgotten. We are given the Freedom OF Religion, not the Freedom FROM Religion. Praise GOD that HIS remnant remains!
JESUS said, "If you are ashamed of ME before men, then I will be ashamed of you before MY FATHER."
Tennessee Football Game
This is a statement that was read over the PA system at the football game at Roane County High School, Kingston, Tennessee, by school Principal, Jody McLeod.
"It has always been the custom at Roane County High School football games, to say a prayer and play the National Anthem, to honor God and Country."
Due to a recent ruling by the Supreme Court, I am told that saying a Prayer is a violation of Federal Case Law. As I understand the law at this time, I can use this public facility to approve of sexual perversion and call it "an alternate lifestyle," and if someone is offended, that's OK.
I can use it to condone sexual promiscuity, by dispensing condoms and calling it, "safe sex." If someone is offended, that's OK.
I can even use this public facility to present the merits of killing an unborn baby as a "viable means of birth control." If someone is offended, no problem ...
I can designate a school day as "Earth Day" and involve students in activities to worship religiously and praise the goddess "Mother Earth" and call it "ecology."
I can use literature, videos and presentations in the classroom that depicts people with strong, traditional Christian convictions as "simple minded" and "ignorant" and call it "enlightenment."
However, if anyone uses this facility to honor GOD and to ask HIM to Bless this event with safety and good sportsmanship, then Federal Case Law is violated.
This appears to be inconsistent at best, and at worst, diabolical Apparently, we are to be tolerant of everything and anyone, except GOD and HIS Commandments.
Nevertheless, as a school principal, I frequently ask staff and students to abide by rules with which they do not necessarily agree. For me to do otherwise would be inconsistent at best, and at worst, hypocritical... I suffer from that affliction enough unintentionally. I certainly do not need to add an intentional transgression.
For this reason, I shall "Render unto Caesar that which is Caesar's," and refrain from praying at this time.
"However, if you feel inspired to honor, praise and thank GOD and ask HIM, in the name of JESUS, to Bless this event, please feel free to do so. As far as I know, that's not against the law—yet."
One by one, the people in the stands bowed their heads, held hands with one another and began to pray. They prayed in the stands. They prayed in the team huddles. They prayed at the concession stand and they prayed in the Announcer's Box!
The only place they didn't pray was in the Supreme Court of the United States of America—the Seat of "Justice" in the "one nation, under GOD."
Somehow, Kingston, Tennessee Remembered what so many have forgotten. We are given the Freedom OF Religion, not the Freedom FROM Religion. Praise GOD that HIS remnant remains!
JESUS said, "If you are ashamed of ME before men, then I will be ashamed of you before MY FATHER."
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
What Are You Thinking?
Have you ever watched a beggar on the street with his/her sign and a container of some sort looking for money? Has anyone ever stopped you on the street and asked for money for a cup of coffee or a hot meal? Did you give them any? What were your thoughts about these people. If you are like most of us, you would wonder why the heck they don't clean themselves up and get respectable jobs like the rest of us. We work for our money so why should we hand it over to someone who chooses not to work?
Have you watched a young person walking down the street with hair in an array of colours like bright pink, blue, or purple? Or maybe the person wearing chains from their waist and rings in their eyes, lips, and noses and tattoed body parts? What about the person who is dirty and smelly and appears to not have changed their clothing in weeks or longer? Most people would make comments like, Did you see that person? I would never let my kid come home looking like that!, Doesn't that person know what soap and water is?
What about the criminal accused of heinous crimes, like mass murders and child molesters? We often persecute them and ask for the death sentence to pay for their crimes.
Think about this:
I grew up in a family situation where someone else's opinions and prejudices were forced on me. I must conform or be judged and subjected to ridicule. Even times when I was minding my own business I was criticized for something or other. Someone who was unhappy with themselves or their life circumstances would judge me based on a reflection of themselves or out of envy that they were unable to feel or think in the direction I was.
I am an individual. I try always, in every situation, to be who I really am. I am not perfect and never claimed to be. If I catch myself making judgments of others, I try to stop and reflect on the fact that I have not walked in their shoes, I have not lived their life, I do not know what they are facing or dealing with in their life anymore than they know that of me. Perhaps they, too, are judging me based on their standards.
I learned the Golden Rule as a child, and I try to live by it as much as possible. I believe in God, and what He has taught me is that there is nothing greater in this world then love, absolutely nothing. There are many kinds of love—love for a partner, your children, your parents and other family members, the love you feel for a friend, and the love we are called upon to extend to our neighbours (those who share our world).
I promise to try my best never to judge you. I have not walked in your shoes. I have not lived your life. And you have not walked in mine. God is my only judge and He is your only judge, and God is pure love.
Have you watched a young person walking down the street with hair in an array of colours like bright pink, blue, or purple? Or maybe the person wearing chains from their waist and rings in their eyes, lips, and noses and tattoed body parts? What about the person who is dirty and smelly and appears to not have changed their clothing in weeks or longer? Most people would make comments like, Did you see that person? I would never let my kid come home looking like that!, Doesn't that person know what soap and water is?
What about the criminal accused of heinous crimes, like mass murders and child molesters? We often persecute them and ask for the death sentence to pay for their crimes.
Think about this:
- That beggar may be experiencing issues in their life that we do not know about. It may be issues that they do not yet know how to address themselves. Yes, it is possible they want the money for drugs or alcohol to feed an addiction, but we cannot know that. If we were in their shoes, would we truly be any different?
- That person who is dirty and smelly? How did they come to be that way. What life experience put them on the street wandering around and not knowing where to go to get clean and having people continuously turn them away? If someone turned you out with only the clothes on your back and no money in your pocket, would you know where to turn?
- That young person who has coloured hair, chains, and piercings could very well be your son or daughter. Why do they choose to be that way? It is an expression of who they are, but does it mean they are not a good person with a pure heart? We tend to label them simply because of the clothes they choose to wear.
- Those mass murderers and child molesters, do they really understand what they are doing? It seems to me they have a psychological problem. Why was it not detected and treated when they were kids? Many parents refuse to believe something is wrong with their children and to seek help for them. Some parents treat their children in such a way that they turn to a life of crime. Is it then OK for society to choose to end their life in turn for another? Do two wrongs make a right?
I grew up in a family situation where someone else's opinions and prejudices were forced on me. I must conform or be judged and subjected to ridicule. Even times when I was minding my own business I was criticized for something or other. Someone who was unhappy with themselves or their life circumstances would judge me based on a reflection of themselves or out of envy that they were unable to feel or think in the direction I was.
I am an individual. I try always, in every situation, to be who I really am. I am not perfect and never claimed to be. If I catch myself making judgments of others, I try to stop and reflect on the fact that I have not walked in their shoes, I have not lived their life, I do not know what they are facing or dealing with in their life anymore than they know that of me. Perhaps they, too, are judging me based on their standards.
I learned the Golden Rule as a child, and I try to live by it as much as possible. I believe in God, and what He has taught me is that there is nothing greater in this world then love, absolutely nothing. There are many kinds of love—love for a partner, your children, your parents and other family members, the love you feel for a friend, and the love we are called upon to extend to our neighbours (those who share our world).
I promise to try my best never to judge you. I have not walked in your shoes. I have not lived your life. And you have not walked in mine. God is my only judge and He is your only judge, and God is pure love.
Monday, August 06, 2007
Casting Spells
My astrologer tells me that right now I am a magician and should dust off my book of magic spells, clean the cauldron, and start thumbing through my spell book. He says that I should be looking for ways to draw down the power of the cosmos and trying to transform something significant. He also says I would be right to expect a great deal of success under these current special celestial circumstances.
Hmmm ... that has many possibilities. Now ... where did I put that eye of newt, toe of frog, wing of bat, and tongue of dog?? OK ... now, where is that spell in the book? Ah ... yes ... there it is ... page 69 ... love potion number 9.
Why not? Don't we all need a little extra loving? I sure do! If the cosmos want me to be happy, then I will do everything I can to assist it. Where do I start? Oh yes ... right ... with believing in myself, trusting my intuition, allowing God to help, and believing that I am loveable and would make someone a good partner. Sorry is that sounds egotistical. It is not meant to be. It is an affirmation of my self-worth ... and I believe I am worth it.
Friday, July 27, 2007
AAADD
AAADD—Know the symptoms. Please read!
Thank goodness there's a name for this disorder. Somehow I feel better, even though I have it!! Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. (Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder). This is how it manifests:
I decide to water my garden.
As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide it needs washing.
As I start toward the garage, I notice mail on the porch table that I brought up from the mail box earlier.
I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.
I lay my car keys on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table, and notice that the can is full.
So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first.
But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first.
I take my chequebook off the table, and see that there is only one cheque left.
My extra cheques are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Coke I'd been drinking.
I'm going to look for my cheques, but first I need to push the Coke aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over.
The Coke is getting warm, and I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.
As I head toward the kitchen with the Coke, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye—they need water.
I put the Coke on the counter and discover my reading glasses that I've been searching for all morning.
I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going to water the flowers.
I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water, and suddenly spot the TV remote. Someone left it on the kitchen table.
I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I'll be looking for the remote, but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers.
I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the floor.
So, I set the remote back on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill.
Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.
At the end of the day:
the car isn't washed
the bills aren't paid
there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter
the flowers don't have enough water,
there is still only one cheque in my chequebook,
I can't find the remote,
I can't find my glasses,
and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.
Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all damn day, and I'm really tired.
I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail.
Thursday, July 26, 2007
Rose Garden
Welcome back, Keyboard. All of us who know you understand why there has been the hiatus. Personally, I look forward to the laughs you will once again share with your friends. Perhaps it will somehow spark some responses from me to keep mine going as well.
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
Feelings
Feelings ... are they good things or bad things? I don't think we would actually really be living if we didn't have feelings about our lives and the happenings in it.
Recently I've been enduring a whole lot of feelings ... and not all of them have been good. I've been happy by times ... those times are wonderful. I feel alive when I can laugh and smile. Those are my favourite times.
I've been sad ... those times are hard, but they make us appreciate the happy times all the more.
I've also been hurt ... those times are extremely painful. I don't believe the hurt was intentional, but then it seldom is. I don't like feeling that intensity of pain. Those are the times you are sure to find me on my knees praying and most likely crying too.
My astrologer says it is the planetary alignment doing this to us Aquarians and some other signs at the moment. I'll be glad when the planets move. I don't mind intense feelings when those feelings are the good kind: happiness, love, passion, romance, laughter, and plain old everyday kick-up-your-heels fun! That's how I want my life to be ... filled mostly with those things, and just enough of the others to help me maintain an appreciation of all that is good. The good stuff just has to be coming my way ... please!!
Recently I've been enduring a whole lot of feelings ... and not all of them have been good. I've been happy by times ... those times are wonderful. I feel alive when I can laugh and smile. Those are my favourite times.
I've been sad ... those times are hard, but they make us appreciate the happy times all the more.
I've also been hurt ... those times are extremely painful. I don't believe the hurt was intentional, but then it seldom is. I don't like feeling that intensity of pain. Those are the times you are sure to find me on my knees praying and most likely crying too.
My astrologer says it is the planetary alignment doing this to us Aquarians and some other signs at the moment. I'll be glad when the planets move. I don't mind intense feelings when those feelings are the good kind: happiness, love, passion, romance, laughter, and plain old everyday kick-up-your-heels fun! That's how I want my life to be ... filled mostly with those things, and just enough of the others to help me maintain an appreciation of all that is good. The good stuff just has to be coming my way ... please!!
Sunday, June 17, 2007
Dear Dad,
A letter to be sent on the wings of an angel:Dear Dad,
It has now been 4 years since I last saw your smile and heard you laugh. Oh, how I miss that. I could always count on you to make me laugh, no matter what kind of day I was having. You knew the magic of a smile and the therapy of a laugh. You gave me that gift too.
I miss your bear hugs. You know, the ones where you would squeeze me tight and lift me clean off my feet? I would love to be able to pick up the phone and call you today, Dad, just to hear you say to me, "You're looking good." That used to make me laugh. Now we can have pictures attached to phone numbers that display when the person calls, but you never got the chance to see those.
I remember the silly things you did to make me laugh as a kid. The way you would take your top dentures out and turn them upside down and stick them out over your top lip. That was so silly, but it made me laugh. I miss the way I used to cuddle up on the bed with you on Saturday nights after a bath and watch Looney Tunes and wrestling with you. Dad, that poor coyote still hasn't caught the roadrunner. You would think with all the money he spent buying those ACME products to set a trap that he would just buy his dinner. Oh well.
Dad, I hope you are happy where you are. You were a happy, fun-loving man, and I thank you for what you meant to me. I still miss you, Dad, and I still love you very much. I will see you again one day. Happy Father's Day!
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
A Beautiful Rose
A rose is more than a beautiful flower. Today I lost a new-found friend. Her name was Rose. This Rose was a beautiful woman who shone from the inside out. She was everything to her family—a terrific mother, a wonderful grandmother, and best friend and soulmate to her husband. The connection she shared with him was amazing. The kind of love that everyone should have an opportunity to share in their lifetime.I had heard so much about her and finally had the pleasure of meeting her a just a few short weeks ago. She had become ill, and I didn't get the opportunity to see her one more time before she passed on to a new life. My brief visit with her was memorable. We took to each other right away. She was warm, friendly, and had a great sense of humour. Her spirit was positive, and she spoke of angels lighting the way for her when she had temporarily lost her sight—a sign of her faith.
I know that Rose will be deeply missed by all who knew and loved her, especially her family and George, the love of her life. Even though I did not know her well, I, too, will miss her. No other rose I've known could compare. So long, Rose, until we meet again. May the angels sing thee to thy rest.
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
Questions That Haunt Me
Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
What disease did cured ham actually have?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
What disease did cured ham actually have?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
Monday, May 21, 2007
What Time Is It?
Time: All the days there have been or ever will be; the past, present, and future (Gage Canadian Dictionary)
Sometimes I get confused as to what time of day you call what. For instance, I know that the morning starts at 12:00:01 a.m., but that is also called the middle of the night. So, is it morning or night? If that is considered night time, what time does morning actually start?
I know that 12 noon starts afternoon, but at what point does it become evening? What time does evening become night?
If the sun marks daytime, what time is daytime? It varies every day as the sun stays out for different amounts of time.
If the sun's disappearance and the moon's appearance marks night, what time does night actually begin. It is dark by 5 p.m. in the winter. Is 5 p.m. afternoon, evening, or night?
What happens when there is a new moon (no moon in the sky)? Is it still nighttime if there is no moon to be seen?
Boy ... am I confused. Can someone please tell me what the hell time of day it is???
Sometimes I get confused as to what time of day you call what. For instance, I know that the morning starts at 12:00:01 a.m., but that is also called the middle of the night. So, is it morning or night? If that is considered night time, what time does morning actually start?
I know that 12 noon starts afternoon, but at what point does it become evening? What time does evening become night?
If the sun marks daytime, what time is daytime? It varies every day as the sun stays out for different amounts of time.
If the sun's disappearance and the moon's appearance marks night, what time does night actually begin. It is dark by 5 p.m. in the winter. Is 5 p.m. afternoon, evening, or night?
What happens when there is a new moon (no moon in the sky)? Is it still nighttime if there is no moon to be seen?
Boy ... am I confused. Can someone please tell me what the hell time of day it is???
Sunday, April 29, 2007
Public Service Announcement
It has been scientifically proven that if we drink 1 litre of water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli (E. coli) bacteria found in feces—body waste. In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of poop. However, we do not run that risk when drinking wine (or rum, whiskey, beer or other liquor) because alcohol has to go through a purification process of boiling or filtering and/or fermenting.
WATER = Poop
WINE = Health
Therefore, it is better to drink wine and talk stupid than to drink water and be full of shit. There is no need to thank me for this valuable information.I am doing it as a public service.
WATER = Poop
WINE = Health
Therefore, it is better to drink wine and talk stupid than to drink water and be full of shit. There is no need to thank me for this valuable information.I am doing it as a public service.
Monday, April 23, 2007
The Answer
an·ti·dis·es·tab·lish·men·tar·i·an·ism
[an-tee-dis-uh-stab-lish-muh
n-tair-ee-uh-niz-uhm, an-tahy-]
–noun
opposition to the withdrawal of state support or recognition from an established church, esp. the Anglican Church in 19th-century England.
Bet you didn't know that, did you?
[an-tee-dis-uh-stab-lish-muh
n-tair-ee-uh-niz-uhm, an-tahy-]–noun
opposition to the withdrawal of state support or recognition from an established church, esp. the Anglican Church in 19th-century England.
Bet you didn't know that, did you?
Did You Know?
The second longest word in the English language is antidisestablishmentarianism. Do you know what it means?
Stay tuned for the answer.
Stay tuned for the answer.
Saturday, April 21, 2007
Making Miracles Happen
I've been doing some reading about cosmic ordering. What that means is just as the name suggests: ordering something from the cosmos (God's universe) and receiving it. The information I am reading is fascinating. It reiterates what I have heard time and again—that we are the rulers of our own destiny. We do, in fact, create our own lives. By our positive or negative thoughts, we draw the good or the bad towards us. If we change the way we think, the possibilities are endless. It is the power of positive thinking, it is faith that knows no bounds, it is unwavering belief in yourself, your abilities, and who you really are and want to be.
If you would like to read about this, check out Kathryn Cassidy's blog, right here on Blogger. This is her link: http://cosmicorder.blogspot.com/
If you read that and come away saying "hogwash," then we know what the cosmos has in store for you—exactly what you believe you will get!! I'm placing my order now and going to work very hard at not wavering on my belief that it will all come to be. I'm not good at waiting, mind you, so it will be difficult, but I will persevere just as I have my whole life, but this time with a whole lot less negativity and a lot more positivity.
Go ahead, read the blog, as she suggests from the first entry at the bottom back up to the top of the page. Give yourself a gift—a change of perspective! I'll bet you won't regret it.
If you would like to read about this, check out Kathryn Cassidy's blog, right here on Blogger. This is her link: http://cosmicorder.blogspot.com/
If you read that and come away saying "hogwash," then we know what the cosmos has in store for you—exactly what you believe you will get!! I'm placing my order now and going to work very hard at not wavering on my belief that it will all come to be. I'm not good at waiting, mind you, so it will be difficult, but I will persevere just as I have my whole life, but this time with a whole lot less negativity and a lot more positivity.
Go ahead, read the blog, as she suggests from the first entry at the bottom back up to the top of the page. Give yourself a gift—a change of perspective! I'll bet you won't regret it.
Monday, April 16, 2007
More School Shootings
The news from Virginia Tech today is devastating. At the time of writing this, it is estimated that 33 are dead and 29 injured. Four are currently in surgery.
It is unbelievable that people feel that they have the right to walk into a school or any place of business or any public place for that matter and just begin shooting and killing innocent people.
A criminal profiler said that we should not be surprised. Society is creating these monsters. That many children are already deemed to be shooters like this from the early age of 9.
Please, tell us what we have done wrong, and let's work at fixing it. This is so sad ... so incredibly sad.
May the souls of the dead rest in peace, and light perpetual shine upon them. Lord, may those who are wounded heal quickly, and may the emotional scars of all those whose lives have been affected by this find a way to heal. Help them all, Lord, as only you can.
It is unbelievable that people feel that they have the right to walk into a school or any place of business or any public place for that matter and just begin shooting and killing innocent people.
A criminal profiler said that we should not be surprised. Society is creating these monsters. That many children are already deemed to be shooters like this from the early age of 9.
Please, tell us what we have done wrong, and let's work at fixing it. This is so sad ... so incredibly sad.
May the souls of the dead rest in peace, and light perpetual shine upon them. Lord, may those who are wounded heal quickly, and may the emotional scars of all those whose lives have been affected by this find a way to heal. Help them all, Lord, as only you can.
Friday, April 13, 2007
Ten Simple Home Remedies
Thought for the Day: Does Cyclops wink or blink?
1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat and presto, the blockage will be almost instantly removed.
2. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.
3. You can avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat just by using the sink.
4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use an egg timer.
5. A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.
6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives. Then you will be afraid to cough.
7. Have a bad toothache? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you will forget all about the toothache.
8. Sometimes, we just need to remember what the rules of life really are:
In life, you only need two tools - WD-40 and Duct Tape.
If it doesn't move but should, use the WD-40.
If it should not move and does, use the duct tape.
9. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
10. Never pass up an opportunity to go to the bathroom.
1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat and presto, the blockage will be almost instantly removed.
2. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.
3. You can avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat just by using the sink.
4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use an egg timer.
5. A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.
6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives. Then you will be afraid to cough.
7. Have a bad toothache? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you will forget all about the toothache.
8. Sometimes, we just need to remember what the rules of life really are:
In life, you only need two tools - WD-40 and Duct Tape.
If it doesn't move but should, use the WD-40.
If it should not move and does, use the duct tape.
9. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
10. Never pass up an opportunity to go to the bathroom.
Sunday, April 08, 2007
Happy Easter!
This day is considered to be the most joyous day of the year. The day that brings the greatest news known to humankind. It is considered a day for new beginnings. May this day bring a new beginning for you too, in whichever way you wish for it to start anew.Happy Easter to you all!
Wednesday, April 04, 2007
Bits and Pieces
Turn Fries
For the life of me, I can't figure out why the package of fries says "Turn fries after 7-8 minutes." Have you ever tried to turn fries? If you use a egg flipper (or whatever turn you use for it), you can't flip them all. You miss some, sure as anything. If you use tongs, you are there forever trying to turn every fry. Why can't they make fries you don't have to turn in the oven?
Muffler Issue
This morning I received a phone call from my ex, who had dropped by to pick my daughter up for work, to tell me that the muffler on my car was hanging off. The hanger had come loose on one side. Oh great!!! This was near 9 a.m. and I had an appointment in town for 11:15. I had just gotten up, had not even gotten dressed or eaten breakfast yet. Now what? Do I leave the car in the yard and take the bus? Only if I have to. My son is at work and is too busy to take some wire to tie it up for me. I wouldn't know where to start to try it myself. Called the local garage owned by my cousin. He was too busy and couldn't fit me in. So I called a local tire store. They said to bring it as quickly as possible and they would see what they could do. Good thing I showered the previous night. I quickly washed up and threw on some clothes. Grabbed my grocery list (where I was going after my appt), grabbed my make-up bag, threw my hair in a ponytail and out the door I went. Luckily my mother lives next door to the business. I thought I would lose the muffler before I got there. It was dragging on the ground. Now my driveway is on an incline with a little dip just prior to reaching the street. I was afraid it would dig in and rip off when I was backing out. So far so good. I drove at only 40 km/h maximum to get there, being careful not to hit any holes, etc., that might rip it off. Phew ... I made it. They discovered the bolt/screw had rusted off and broke. They replaced it and called to say it was done before I got my make-up on at my Mom's. The cost to me? No charge. God bless them. They saved my day and my budget.
No Tools Required
I'm on vacation this week, and set myself the task of cleaning up my utility room and getting it organized. A few weeks ago I bought a set of shelving to put in there, each shelf holding up to 600 lbs of weight and no tools required to put it together. No tools? Hmmm ... I should be able to do this. I put one set together using tools, so this should be easier. Well ... first of all, I needed someone to carry the sucker to my car. I couldn't lift it. It was heavy as hell. Then I had to enlist my neighbour to bring it into the house because my son had injured his shoulder. No tools? Well, I needed to get it out of the box. That required a utility knife. Is that not a tool? That box was not coming out with me trying to rip it open. No siree. Step one ... take the pieces out of the box and ensure they were all there. Yes, they were. Step two ... put the feet into the bottom of the first set of vertical braces. Do not use a hammer. Do not use a hammer? Holy shit! The palm of my hand was hurting from hitting that sucker. An FBH was sounding good. OK ... the directions are very good with this unit. It was going together pretty good. Then I hit the middle part where the vertical supports are joined. I sure could have used an extra set of hands or some tool to hold things in place for a moment because the plastic connector is not strong. Down comes the top part of the support, right across the top of my head. Ouch!! Damn this no tools! Maybe we just need a second pair of hands to get the job done without injury. They don't put that on the package. Maybe they should.
For the life of me, I can't figure out why the package of fries says "Turn fries after 7-8 minutes." Have you ever tried to turn fries? If you use a egg flipper (or whatever turn you use for it), you can't flip them all. You miss some, sure as anything. If you use tongs, you are there forever trying to turn every fry. Why can't they make fries you don't have to turn in the oven?
Muffler Issue
This morning I received a phone call from my ex, who had dropped by to pick my daughter up for work, to tell me that the muffler on my car was hanging off. The hanger had come loose on one side. Oh great!!! This was near 9 a.m. and I had an appointment in town for 11:15. I had just gotten up, had not even gotten dressed or eaten breakfast yet. Now what? Do I leave the car in the yard and take the bus? Only if I have to. My son is at work and is too busy to take some wire to tie it up for me. I wouldn't know where to start to try it myself. Called the local garage owned by my cousin. He was too busy and couldn't fit me in. So I called a local tire store. They said to bring it as quickly as possible and they would see what they could do. Good thing I showered the previous night. I quickly washed up and threw on some clothes. Grabbed my grocery list (where I was going after my appt), grabbed my make-up bag, threw my hair in a ponytail and out the door I went. Luckily my mother lives next door to the business. I thought I would lose the muffler before I got there. It was dragging on the ground. Now my driveway is on an incline with a little dip just prior to reaching the street. I was afraid it would dig in and rip off when I was backing out. So far so good. I drove at only 40 km/h maximum to get there, being careful not to hit any holes, etc., that might rip it off. Phew ... I made it. They discovered the bolt/screw had rusted off and broke. They replaced it and called to say it was done before I got my make-up on at my Mom's. The cost to me? No charge. God bless them. They saved my day and my budget.
No Tools Required
I'm on vacation this week, and set myself the task of cleaning up my utility room and getting it organized. A few weeks ago I bought a set of shelving to put in there, each shelf holding up to 600 lbs of weight and no tools required to put it together. No tools? Hmmm ... I should be able to do this. I put one set together using tools, so this should be easier. Well ... first of all, I needed someone to carry the sucker to my car. I couldn't lift it. It was heavy as hell. Then I had to enlist my neighbour to bring it into the house because my son had injured his shoulder. No tools? Well, I needed to get it out of the box. That required a utility knife. Is that not a tool? That box was not coming out with me trying to rip it open. No siree. Step one ... take the pieces out of the box and ensure they were all there. Yes, they were. Step two ... put the feet into the bottom of the first set of vertical braces. Do not use a hammer. Do not use a hammer? Holy shit! The palm of my hand was hurting from hitting that sucker. An FBH was sounding good. OK ... the directions are very good with this unit. It was going together pretty good. Then I hit the middle part where the vertical supports are joined. I sure could have used an extra set of hands or some tool to hold things in place for a moment because the plastic connector is not strong. Down comes the top part of the support, right across the top of my head. Ouch!! Damn this no tools! Maybe we just need a second pair of hands to get the job done without injury. They don't put that on the package. Maybe they should.