This is a response to the blog at Sam's Place.
I have to say that I am glad that I don't have to buy school supplies or new school clothes this year. It's a little lighter on the pocketbook. Working in education for the past 24 years, I know the reasons behind some of these things that Keyboard mentions.
The school supply lists are created for the younger grades to ensure that each student has the supplies required for the curriculum that has been planned for the year. The reason that specific brands are mentioned in some cases is to ensure that each student starts out with the same things, on equal footings, if you will. Sometimes it is because they are known to be of a superior quality or will last longer. Some types of notebooks will fall apart easily so that students may lose their work, while others are made to last. It is not a requirement that all students have a particular brand, it is merely a recommendation. Teachers and administrators are very aware of how students are treated by each other if they don't come from the same economic background. They try to avoid these issues in the classroom as much as possible. It is not a well-known fact, but there are a lot of ways that low-income families can get help with the purchase of school supplies to avoid embarrassment or ridicule by their peers. We believe in a quality equal-opportunity education for ALL students.
Sometimes there are safety issues around some items. For example, strings in hoods on playgrounds. Sneakers with Velcro are recommended for very young students who do not yet know how to tie their own. This is both a safety issue and one of time management. Grade primary classrooms have many more students in them then in our day. It would be impossible for a teacher to have to tie the shoes for 30 students at every recess, lunch, and after school break. Black-soled shoes leave black marks on the floors of gymnasiums which are hard to clean and can build up to cause a dangerous surface. It all makes sense, somewhere along the way.
As for the fashion, I have to agree with you. There is way too much peer pressure about brand label clothing. Too much emphasis is placed on trends that come and go quickly so that parents are kept poor buying new clothes to keep up with the trends. I was lucky enough to have at least one child who didn't care about labels. She liked the styles, and if she could find the style in something way cheaper, that was good enough for her. Thank heavens. Then again, this is the same child who died her hair blue and didn't care when people called her blueberry. Then she died it burgundy too. She is truly an individual. At least I have e-Bay to work with for the brand name stuff my son likes. You can get some great deals on there. I just got one for him for his birthday. A 75% off the retail price. Can't beat that!!!
God forbid that schools ever dictate that students have a laptop to do their school work. Can you imagine the younger students lugging one to school everyday? How many times would they drop it in the run of a year? Egads!!!! Good thing our school supply days are over, hey Keyboard?
Well ... I still have post-secondary to go, if they ever decide to do that!!!
Tuesday, August 31, 2004
Monday, August 30, 2004
Boredom
I have never known so much boredom in my life as I have in the past year. I just can't find enough to do to keep me occupied most of the time. It must be contagious in my house because my son is suffering from the same disease. He gets really cranky and mad when he is bored. I hope something gives soon before we lose our sanity.
I am slowly going crazy, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, switch. Crazy going slowly am I, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, switch.
I am slowly going crazy, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, switch. Crazy going slowly am I, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, switch.
Sunday, August 29, 2004
Dreams
I love to daydream. It provides an escape for me into a fantasy world that I can create just for me. That perfect place where all is right in my world, just as I had always wished for. I've been a daydreamer since I was a child. That's why I call myself the Dreamweaver.
Dreams at night are a whole different story. I truly believe that our dreams are where our subconscious deals with things that we don't want to deal with in our waking state. Or they have solutions to problems we have been struggling with because our bodies are in a relaxed state so we have less control over fighting against them. I love to analyse my dreams. Sometimes they are full of hope. Sometimes they do, indeed, provide me a solution to a problem or an answer to a question.
I have too many dreams that are full of struggles. I constantly dream I am fighting against something (usually weather elements) to get where I want to be. In almost all of these dreams, though, the scenery suddenly changes to something absolutely beautiful and peaceful. I like that part of it. It makes me feel like something wonderful will be the end result of hard work. In fact, my Tarot card reading the other day told me twice that I will have a huge, unexpected change in my life in the near future. That would be wonderful. Too good to be true.
This week, I have had many dreams about the pain and anger I have endured in my past. Each dream is different, but the key players are the same. I thought I had gotten past all of this, but perhaps I only have in my awakened state. Perhaps it is simply a fear of enduring that all over again, a place I don't want to go. Perhaps I am subconsciously rebuilding a wall to protect myself, a wall I had removed. Maybe it is because I have trouble trusting that something good will come to me. All I know for certain is that I don't like waking up feeling as though I have been fighting all night long, like I am this morning. It makes the night's sleep feel like it didn't happen.
What do you dream about?
Dreams at night are a whole different story. I truly believe that our dreams are where our subconscious deals with things that we don't want to deal with in our waking state. Or they have solutions to problems we have been struggling with because our bodies are in a relaxed state so we have less control over fighting against them. I love to analyse my dreams. Sometimes they are full of hope. Sometimes they do, indeed, provide me a solution to a problem or an answer to a question.
I have too many dreams that are full of struggles. I constantly dream I am fighting against something (usually weather elements) to get where I want to be. In almost all of these dreams, though, the scenery suddenly changes to something absolutely beautiful and peaceful. I like that part of it. It makes me feel like something wonderful will be the end result of hard work. In fact, my Tarot card reading the other day told me twice that I will have a huge, unexpected change in my life in the near future. That would be wonderful. Too good to be true.
This week, I have had many dreams about the pain and anger I have endured in my past. Each dream is different, but the key players are the same. I thought I had gotten past all of this, but perhaps I only have in my awakened state. Perhaps it is simply a fear of enduring that all over again, a place I don't want to go. Perhaps I am subconsciously rebuilding a wall to protect myself, a wall I had removed. Maybe it is because I have trouble trusting that something good will come to me. All I know for certain is that I don't like waking up feeling as though I have been fighting all night long, like I am this morning. It makes the night's sleep feel like it didn't happen.
What do you dream about?
Saturday, August 28, 2004
September Is A-Comin'
I absolutely love September. It is my favourite month of the year. The weather starts to cool off some, the evenings are cool enough to sleep well, the leaves begin to turn their beautiful shades, and we still have warm beautiful days. I love the month so much, I even planned my son's birth for then. I think it is the perfect time of year for vacations, weddings, and other special events.
This year my son turns 19. He is rather excited about that. I wonder why??? Then the only thing he can't do is rent a car. I know just what to buy for him too. He would like me to buy him a Honda motorcycle, but I'm afraid he would only get a diecast scale model of one from me. Oh well. He'll just have to work for it like the rest of us.
So I am just sitting back thinking "let September come." I'm going to try to enjoy every day of it. Hope you enjoy it too.
This year my son turns 19. He is rather excited about that. I wonder why??? Then the only thing he can't do is rent a car. I know just what to buy for him too. He would like me to buy him a Honda motorcycle, but I'm afraid he would only get a diecast scale model of one from me. Oh well. He'll just have to work for it like the rest of us.
So I am just sitting back thinking "let September come." I'm going to try to enjoy every day of it. Hope you enjoy it too.
Thursday, August 26, 2004
Blah!!!
It's been a busy week. Not much to say today. Hope you all had a good day. Remember: Every day above ground is a good day!!!!
Wednesday, August 25, 2004
Spooky
I had to walk home at twilight from a visit with my daughter, taking a path between streets. That is a little unnerving at the best of times when you walk alone. However, twilight is a funny time to be out. The sun is not bright enough to see clearly, but it is not dark enough for the street lights to make any difference in how well you can see either. I couldn't see people's faces and sometimes even recognize their gender until they were almost right up to me. Spooky...
Start Early
It's 4 months until Christmas. Start your shopping early!!! I must start thinking about my letter to Santa. This year I want ....
Monday, August 23, 2004
Evolution, Change, and Transition
Over the eons, eras, and generations, life has evolved. Change and transition can be a good thing; sometimes perhaps not.
When my parents were children, times were very different. They both grew up on farms and had chores to attend to each day. Money was sparse, but the necessities of life were provided. No frills, just hard work. During those days, personal lives were kept very private, sex was not spoken about, and children born out of wedlock were something to be ashamed of. Children were still bullies or kind. That doesn't seem to have changed much.
When we were children we still were faced with daily chores, sex was more open with the days of "hippies," and many children born out of wedlock were given up for adoption. Education was a more of a priority for us than our parents generation, and salaries were on the rise. We had a few more toys than our parents generation, but still used our imaginations a lot to make our fun.
Then we grew up and had children. Boy have things changed!! Salaries and the cost of living have risen to the point that both parents now need to work. Education is priority #1 for our children. If they don't hav that, they cannot succeed in life. Salaries and the cost of living are not proportional. We give and give to our children and expect them to do little or nothing in the way of chores. We provide their basic needs and soooo much more. Teenage pregnancies are an everyday happening, and our children don't know how to amuse themselves without expensive toys. Sex is exploited everywhere.
How things have changed! But how do we handle it? We give our children more attention then did the previous generations. I don't see this as a bad thing. We don't expect our children to make their own way through life; we provide the majority of it. Considering the high cost of living this may not be a bad thing either.
But do we coddle them too much? Do we raise children who are toughened to the realities of life or do we shelter them to the point of them becoming soft? The high stress factors of our society are hard to deal with. Do we shelter them from too much of it? Do we solve their problems for them instead of teaching them to make their own decisions? Do we make them work for the things they want or do we go out of our way to hand them over freely over a sense of guilt for some reason? Do we tiptoe around them too much or do expose them to the harshness life can hand their way and teach them how to deal with it? The greed of society has created many hardened criminals and a "me" generation who believes life owes them everything. By giving so many material things to our children, are we creating a society of people who can't think for themselves or know how to appreciate what they do have?
There was a time when I believed that children of military families had it rough, constantly moving from place to place, province to province, or even country to country. Never having a chance to really settle down and have a place to call home. Now I think I was wrong. Those friends of mine who grew up that way were far stronger than I could ever have hoped to be. They were exposed to many different cultures and ways of life to which they had to adjust. They made friends much easier than I do, and they can cope with change and transition easily, sometimes even thriving on it.
Parenting is never easy, nor is change. It's tough to raise children these days. I wish they came with an "owner's manual."
When my parents were children, times were very different. They both grew up on farms and had chores to attend to each day. Money was sparse, but the necessities of life were provided. No frills, just hard work. During those days, personal lives were kept very private, sex was not spoken about, and children born out of wedlock were something to be ashamed of. Children were still bullies or kind. That doesn't seem to have changed much.
When we were children we still were faced with daily chores, sex was more open with the days of "hippies," and many children born out of wedlock were given up for adoption. Education was a more of a priority for us than our parents generation, and salaries were on the rise. We had a few more toys than our parents generation, but still used our imaginations a lot to make our fun.
Then we grew up and had children. Boy have things changed!! Salaries and the cost of living have risen to the point that both parents now need to work. Education is priority #1 for our children. If they don't hav that, they cannot succeed in life. Salaries and the cost of living are not proportional. We give and give to our children and expect them to do little or nothing in the way of chores. We provide their basic needs and soooo much more. Teenage pregnancies are an everyday happening, and our children don't know how to amuse themselves without expensive toys. Sex is exploited everywhere.
How things have changed! But how do we handle it? We give our children more attention then did the previous generations. I don't see this as a bad thing. We don't expect our children to make their own way through life; we provide the majority of it. Considering the high cost of living this may not be a bad thing either.
But do we coddle them too much? Do we raise children who are toughened to the realities of life or do we shelter them to the point of them becoming soft? The high stress factors of our society are hard to deal with. Do we shelter them from too much of it? Do we solve their problems for them instead of teaching them to make their own decisions? Do we make them work for the things they want or do we go out of our way to hand them over freely over a sense of guilt for some reason? Do we tiptoe around them too much or do expose them to the harshness life can hand their way and teach them how to deal with it? The greed of society has created many hardened criminals and a "me" generation who believes life owes them everything. By giving so many material things to our children, are we creating a society of people who can't think for themselves or know how to appreciate what they do have?
There was a time when I believed that children of military families had it rough, constantly moving from place to place, province to province, or even country to country. Never having a chance to really settle down and have a place to call home. Now I think I was wrong. Those friends of mine who grew up that way were far stronger than I could ever have hoped to be. They were exposed to many different cultures and ways of life to which they had to adjust. They made friends much easier than I do, and they can cope with change and transition easily, sometimes even thriving on it.
Parenting is never easy, nor is change. It's tough to raise children these days. I wish they came with an "owner's manual."
Sunday, August 22, 2004
The Happiness Connection
I've just read an article in Reader's Digest that makes the world of sense. It sets out the steps suggested for a parent to ensure their children are happy. These steps are:
- Have dinner together: Doesn't have to be every night and can be a different meal of the day or even just a snack, but this connection is important.
- Try not to rule by intimidation: Set limits in the name of a principle like fair play, sharing, and respecting other's feelings.
- Create your own traditions: Like Friday night movies or Saturday afternoon ice cream or even saying grace before a meal.
- Stick up for what you think is right: Sometimes parents need to be parents and say no and enforce it.
- Read aloud to them as long as they will let you: This promotes togetherness, literacy, and growth of imagination.
- Touch. Hug. Snuggle. Kiss. Pat. Tickle. Wrestle: Saying I love you can become automatic and be ignored. You can't ignore a hug or physical closeness. (This is also true of adults. I love physical closeness. That connection is very important for me too. I grew up without it.)
- Philosophize: Give good advice like "You'll always be okay in life as long as you have one close friend." or "Always look on the bright side."
- Get Your Kids Talking: Find times to talk rather than sitting listening to TV or interacting on line.
- Enjoy Your Children: Don't spend all your time regulating them and looking after basic needs. Grab the pleasure of playing with them. Celebrate mud and messes, noise, and spooky things, etc.
Saturday, August 21, 2004
Housing
Wow!!! Now I understand why my banker never bothered to call me back about getting a mortgage and why the banking centre rep said to me "You need a second income."
I have just been perusing the MLS listings for modest housing in my community. Apparently there is no such thing. It would appear that even the lowest priced housing would require some sweat equity on my part, something I may not be physically capable of. Even trying to rent something like that is phenomenally priced. My cousin suggested buying something with a rental property attached, but I'm not sure I would have the energy to be anyone's landlord. That would be additional responsibility to handle on my own. Not sure I would want that, but I will keep it in mind. I like my privacy too, so renting rooms in someone's house is not particularly appealing either, unless it was a separate apartment. Hmmm ... there has to be a way out of here. This labyrinth has an exit. Of that I am sure. I am will find it. It will just take me a little time.
I have just been perusing the MLS listings for modest housing in my community. Apparently there is no such thing. It would appear that even the lowest priced housing would require some sweat equity on my part, something I may not be physically capable of. Even trying to rent something like that is phenomenally priced. My cousin suggested buying something with a rental property attached, but I'm not sure I would have the energy to be anyone's landlord. That would be additional responsibility to handle on my own. Not sure I would want that, but I will keep it in mind. I like my privacy too, so renting rooms in someone's house is not particularly appealing either, unless it was a separate apartment. Hmmm ... there has to be a way out of here. This labyrinth has an exit. Of that I am sure. I am will find it. It will just take me a little time.
Friday, August 20, 2004
I Think I Can ... I Know I Can
Remember the little train that could? It started out by believing it couldn't do something, then it started up that big hill saying "I think I can, I think I can," which later became "I know I can, I know I can."
I was reminded of that story today while at the gym. They usually have a little positive saying displayed there. What a great idea!! Today it said: Refuse to believe you can't. I needed to see that today. Funny about that isn't it, how these things seem to appear exactly when you need to see them? I have always told my children that there is nothing they cannot do if they want it bad enough. It may require time and a lot of hard work on their part, but they can accomplish what they put their mind and heart into. I guess I need to practise what I preach, huh?
I think I can ... I know I can ... with time.
I was reminded of that story today while at the gym. They usually have a little positive saying displayed there. What a great idea!! Today it said: Refuse to believe you can't. I needed to see that today. Funny about that isn't it, how these things seem to appear exactly when you need to see them? I have always told my children that there is nothing they cannot do if they want it bad enough. It may require time and a lot of hard work on their part, but they can accomplish what they put their mind and heart into. I guess I need to practise what I preach, huh?
I think I can ... I know I can ... with time.
The Meaning of Life
Far better is it to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure ... than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in a gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat. — Theodore Roosevelt
I have done much searching for the meaning of my life. I want to know why I am here, what is my purpose, what does the future hold. I've discovered that much of that is not meant to be known. We only have today to live in. The past cannot be changed, and the future has yet to happen.
What I have found is this: My past has shaped who I am. I made good choices and bad choices over the years, but I am who I am because of them. I made a decision to change my life to rid it of extreme stress. That decision left me with some financial restraints that are difficult to deal with by times, but in reality it is only money. That is not the most important thing in life. I have the necessities of life, but may not have those little things that I would like to have that would make life a little easier. But I WILL have them eventually. It is hard to wait, but I know it will come in time.
This life change left me with a different type of lifestyle that was certainly an adjustment for us all, but that, too, works itself out, and did much quicker than I expected it would. There are aspects of the type of life I left behind that I miss, sometimes very much so, but I still have never looked back or regretted my decision. It is those missing aspects that bring me down by times too. I must remain positive that this, too, will come in time. I met someone yesterday who struggles with this kind of change too, so it was comforting to know that I am not the only one who faces these demons.
How very impatient I am. That is not good. I am working very hard to regain a positive outlook. To regain my belief that I KNOW these things will come in time, and they will be good. Probably better than I can even imagine and perhaps differently than I imagine them as well. So ... if you notice me being impatient, gently remind me to relax. It will come. Stay positive, Dreamweaver, your dreams will come in time, and they will be good. Yes, they will be good.
I have done much searching for the meaning of my life. I want to know why I am here, what is my purpose, what does the future hold. I've discovered that much of that is not meant to be known. We only have today to live in. The past cannot be changed, and the future has yet to happen.
What I have found is this: My past has shaped who I am. I made good choices and bad choices over the years, but I am who I am because of them. I made a decision to change my life to rid it of extreme stress. That decision left me with some financial restraints that are difficult to deal with by times, but in reality it is only money. That is not the most important thing in life. I have the necessities of life, but may not have those little things that I would like to have that would make life a little easier. But I WILL have them eventually. It is hard to wait, but I know it will come in time.
This life change left me with a different type of lifestyle that was certainly an adjustment for us all, but that, too, works itself out, and did much quicker than I expected it would. There are aspects of the type of life I left behind that I miss, sometimes very much so, but I still have never looked back or regretted my decision. It is those missing aspects that bring me down by times too. I must remain positive that this, too, will come in time. I met someone yesterday who struggles with this kind of change too, so it was comforting to know that I am not the only one who faces these demons.
How very impatient I am. That is not good. I am working very hard to regain a positive outlook. To regain my belief that I KNOW these things will come in time, and they will be good. Probably better than I can even imagine and perhaps differently than I imagine them as well. So ... if you notice me being impatient, gently remind me to relax. It will come. Stay positive, Dreamweaver, your dreams will come in time, and they will be good. Yes, they will be good.
Thursday, August 19, 2004
Courage
Courage — n. the strength of mind to control fear and act firmly in the face of danger or difficulties.
This seems like such a simple word, but it is the most difficult thing I know to muster. Many times in my life I have needed to find the courage to do something that I felt I just could not do. I often, still, find myself in this position, as probably most everyone does. We all have fears we have to face. There is no question that it is harder for some to do this than it is for others. Some people seem to be very strong or unafraid of most everything and just plunge right in, some times never giving it any thought at all. Others, like me, often take a great deal of time of gather the courage to do something, even when you know it is what must be done. It just seems so hard to do. How often I have thought "Surely someone else will do the hard work so I don't have to. Someone else can take that step and make it easier for me." Truth of the matter is, if it is something I want or need to do, then it is me who must find the courage. Stepping outside the box is not easy.
Do you suppose if I follow the yellow brick road that the Wizard of Oz will grant me courage? Follow the yellow brick road ... follow the yellow brick road ... I'm off to see the Wizard, the wonderful Wizard of Oz ...
Perhaps somewhere over the rainbow ...
This seems like such a simple word, but it is the most difficult thing I know to muster. Many times in my life I have needed to find the courage to do something that I felt I just could not do. I often, still, find myself in this position, as probably most everyone does. We all have fears we have to face. There is no question that it is harder for some to do this than it is for others. Some people seem to be very strong or unafraid of most everything and just plunge right in, some times never giving it any thought at all. Others, like me, often take a great deal of time of gather the courage to do something, even when you know it is what must be done. It just seems so hard to do. How often I have thought "Surely someone else will do the hard work so I don't have to. Someone else can take that step and make it easier for me." Truth of the matter is, if it is something I want or need to do, then it is me who must find the courage. Stepping outside the box is not easy.
Do you suppose if I follow the yellow brick road that the Wizard of Oz will grant me courage? Follow the yellow brick road ... follow the yellow brick road ... I'm off to see the Wizard, the wonderful Wizard of Oz ...
Perhaps somewhere over the rainbow ...
Wednesday, August 18, 2004
R-E-S-P-E-C-T
Do you remember that song by Tina Turner? That song says an awful lot really, especially if you know the story behind her life.
Respect is something we all deserve to have and need to give to ourselves and others. Tina lived a dominated life under her ex-husband's hands. He bullied her and beat her into a submissive lifestyle. He had no respect for her and she deserved to have it. Eventually she had no self-respect either by allowing herself to be treated that way. I was so happy for her when she finally found the courage to break free of that lifestyle.
Can you imagine how children must feel in school when someone bullies them? We see so much teen suicide because they don't know how to deal with such things or nobody teaches them self-respect. If they live a daily life at home witnessing one parent dominating the other to any degree how do they learn to give respect and expect to receive it as well? Some of them grow up to be bullies, others to allow themselves to be bullied. I grew up in such a household. I know that no families are perfect, but I can see the damage that each of us children have taken with us as a result, and it is not pretty. We watched one parent being dominated by the other and it being accepted over and over again. Now I can see myself and my siblings allowing others to treat us badly or take advantage of us, and we accept that far too easily, sometimes not even realizing that it is happening because it feels all too familiar. I have one sibling who can be that bully, too. It's a sad state of affairs. I think my eyes are open to that far more than those of my siblings, but I still fall victim to that easily because of my giving nature. I find that some people tend to take what they want and need from me without returning much, if anything, and leaving me feel empty and used. My life has been so full of such experiences that it leaves me, by times, wondering how much self-respect I have to allow it to happen again and again.
So please, remove the blinders. Give others the respect they deserve, but just as importantly, have enough self-respect not to allow yourself to be dominated or used by others. Don't become a bully and don't accept disrespect in your life. You are worth it.
Respect is something we all deserve to have and need to give to ourselves and others. Tina lived a dominated life under her ex-husband's hands. He bullied her and beat her into a submissive lifestyle. He had no respect for her and she deserved to have it. Eventually she had no self-respect either by allowing herself to be treated that way. I was so happy for her when she finally found the courage to break free of that lifestyle.
Can you imagine how children must feel in school when someone bullies them? We see so much teen suicide because they don't know how to deal with such things or nobody teaches them self-respect. If they live a daily life at home witnessing one parent dominating the other to any degree how do they learn to give respect and expect to receive it as well? Some of them grow up to be bullies, others to allow themselves to be bullied. I grew up in such a household. I know that no families are perfect, but I can see the damage that each of us children have taken with us as a result, and it is not pretty. We watched one parent being dominated by the other and it being accepted over and over again. Now I can see myself and my siblings allowing others to treat us badly or take advantage of us, and we accept that far too easily, sometimes not even realizing that it is happening because it feels all too familiar. I have one sibling who can be that bully, too. It's a sad state of affairs. I think my eyes are open to that far more than those of my siblings, but I still fall victim to that easily because of my giving nature. I find that some people tend to take what they want and need from me without returning much, if anything, and leaving me feel empty and used. My life has been so full of such experiences that it leaves me, by times, wondering how much self-respect I have to allow it to happen again and again.
So please, remove the blinders. Give others the respect they deserve, but just as importantly, have enough self-respect not to allow yourself to be dominated or used by others. Don't become a bully and don't accept disrespect in your life. You are worth it.
Tuesday, August 17, 2004
I Walk Alone
I learned to walk when I was but a babe.
You took my hands and lead me along.
But soon I walked alone.
Adolescence is a time of change.
Confusion and excitement always in exchange.
I need your hand, but it is not there.
So I must walk alone.
I'm told, "I love you like no one else ever will."
I hear "No one else will ever love you."
I believe it. I hurt. Through ups and downs
I reach for your hand, but it is not there.
I walk this road alone.
Life must change.
Free from bondage at last.
But a piece is still missing.
And I continue to walk alone.
My dreams are not to be.
I know no reason why.
Perhaps I am unworthy.
It seems I am destined to walk alone.
You took my hands and lead me along.
But soon I walked alone.
Adolescence is a time of change.
Confusion and excitement always in exchange.
I need your hand, but it is not there.
So I must walk alone.
I'm told, "I love you like no one else ever will."
I hear "No one else will ever love you."
I believe it. I hurt. Through ups and downs
I reach for your hand, but it is not there.
I walk this road alone.
Life must change.
Free from bondage at last.
But a piece is still missing.
And I continue to walk alone.
My dreams are not to be.
I know no reason why.
Perhaps I am unworthy.
It seems I am destined to walk alone.
Monday, August 16, 2004
Butterflies Are Free
If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it is yours. If it doesn't, it never was.
How often I have heard this saying. I think of it like this: If you hold a butterfly on the palm of your hand, it is free to fly about and live its life. Feeling safe, unthreatened, and loved it will return to your hand. But if you hold it tightly in a closed hand, it will try everything and every opportunity it can to get away or else it will suffocate and die.
I believe this to be true. I have seen butterflies that are held tightly, and they certainly do make their opportunities to get away or they do suffocate and die under such restrictions. Sometimes I think that some of these butterflies live for the exhilaration of being able to get away and then come back to suffer again and continue this cycle. What an unhealthy choice.
Metamorphosis exists for a reason. Those caterpillars creep slowly along foraging on leaves until their time comes to make a complete change. Then they wrap themselves tightly and safely for a short time until they are ready to emerge to a new and different life. If we free them from the cocoon, they will die. They need to endure the struggle to become strong enough to fly away.
How similar our lives can be to those butterflies. I believe that each of us undergoes a metamorphosis of one sort or another at some point in our lives. It is the struggle in-between from one state to another that makes the new you better than the one before.
How often I have heard this saying. I think of it like this: If you hold a butterfly on the palm of your hand, it is free to fly about and live its life. Feeling safe, unthreatened, and loved it will return to your hand. But if you hold it tightly in a closed hand, it will try everything and every opportunity it can to get away or else it will suffocate and die.
I believe this to be true. I have seen butterflies that are held tightly, and they certainly do make their opportunities to get away or they do suffocate and die under such restrictions. Sometimes I think that some of these butterflies live for the exhilaration of being able to get away and then come back to suffer again and continue this cycle. What an unhealthy choice.
Metamorphosis exists for a reason. Those caterpillars creep slowly along foraging on leaves until their time comes to make a complete change. Then they wrap themselves tightly and safely for a short time until they are ready to emerge to a new and different life. If we free them from the cocoon, they will die. They need to endure the struggle to become strong enough to fly away.
How similar our lives can be to those butterflies. I believe that each of us undergoes a metamorphosis of one sort or another at some point in our lives. It is the struggle in-between from one state to another that makes the new you better than the one before.
Sunday, August 15, 2004
Say What?
22 reasons why the English language is so hard to learn:
1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm used to be used to produce produce.
3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4) We must polish the Polish furniture.
5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
18) After a number of injections my jaw got number.
19) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
20) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
21) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
22) He was about to read the red book, but discovered he had already read it.
1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm used to be used to produce produce.
3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4) We must polish the Polish furniture.
5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
18) After a number of injections my jaw got number.
19) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
20) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
21) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
22) He was about to read the red book, but discovered he had already read it.
Saturday, August 14, 2004
Face It
Sort it out. Stop trying to sweep it under the carpet. It won't disappear if you ignore it. And if you decide to run from it, it will follow you. So that leaves only one option. Face it, fair and square.— Jonathan Cainer
Another moment of truth from the astrologer. It is so true. We often try to sweep things under the carpet that we don't want to deal with. Bury our head in the sand. But it doesn't go away like that. It hangs over our head like a black cloud threatening to rain down on us at any moment. The only solution is to face it, deal with, and get on with living our lives. In some cases it may be the most difficult thing we have ever had to do, but it is also important if we are to have the quality of life we want and deserve.
Another moment of truth from the astrologer. It is so true. We often try to sweep things under the carpet that we don't want to deal with. Bury our head in the sand. But it doesn't go away like that. It hangs over our head like a black cloud threatening to rain down on us at any moment. The only solution is to face it, deal with, and get on with living our lives. In some cases it may be the most difficult thing we have ever had to do, but it is also important if we are to have the quality of life we want and deserve.
Friday, August 13, 2004
Friday the 13th
Friday 13th? Why don't we worry about Thursday 12th, or Saturday 14th? Surely, we should be equally concerned about Wednesday 11th or Sunday 15th. If Friday 13th means anything at all, it must be like a rotten apple poisoning the entire month on which it falls. And if there's a month with Friday 13th in it, surely, that turns the whole year bad. And a bad year must play its part in creating a bad decade. And unlucky decade probably taints the entire century. So we are all doomed. You see how easy it is to paint a gloomy picture? — Jonathan Cainer
I don't believe in superstitions. But Cainer is right. The mind is so powerful that if we believe something like this to be true, we can make it true. Any day that starts out bad, we believe "What a day this is going to be!" Lo and behold, we make it so. If we look at that first bad thing and say "It can only get better." it will.
Each month has a 13th in it. Regardless of which day it falls on, it is not a bad omen. So enjoy your day to the fullest.
I don't believe in superstitions. But Cainer is right. The mind is so powerful that if we believe something like this to be true, we can make it true. Any day that starts out bad, we believe "What a day this is going to be!" Lo and behold, we make it so. If we look at that first bad thing and say "It can only get better." it will.
Each month has a 13th in it. Regardless of which day it falls on, it is not a bad omen. So enjoy your day to the fullest.
Thursday, August 12, 2004
Onion Skin
This is quoted from my favourite astrological site for Leo for today, but is so full of truth:
Our fears and anxieties are like layers of onion skin. We peel away one and, no matter how much it may make us cry, we find another beneath. We think, 'I am worried about this because of that.' Even when we sort the matter out, we realise that there is another cause for concern buried more deeply. Eventually, we find the one disturbing childhood memory around which all other phobias have developed.
So many of my friends all tell me the same thing: when they realize they have an issue in their life, it usually stems back to something from their childhood and it took a lot of digging to uncover that truth. I found this in my own life too. Peeling away those layers is a very difficult thing to do. I did shed a great many tears, only to find the next layer made me cry too. I don't know if anyone ever gets to the very inside before they die, but it is progress at least to peel away those unwanted layers.
The forecast goes on to say this:
Pluto is now giving you a precious insight into your past. This will yet become the reason why your future starts to look so much more inviting and inspiring.
When those outer layers are gone, there is no doubt that the future does start to look more inviting and inspiring. So start peeling away those layers and expose the you that you really are and can be. It is well worth the work. Believe me.
Our fears and anxieties are like layers of onion skin. We peel away one and, no matter how much it may make us cry, we find another beneath. We think, 'I am worried about this because of that.' Even when we sort the matter out, we realise that there is another cause for concern buried more deeply. Eventually, we find the one disturbing childhood memory around which all other phobias have developed.
So many of my friends all tell me the same thing: when they realize they have an issue in their life, it usually stems back to something from their childhood and it took a lot of digging to uncover that truth. I found this in my own life too. Peeling away those layers is a very difficult thing to do. I did shed a great many tears, only to find the next layer made me cry too. I don't know if anyone ever gets to the very inside before they die, but it is progress at least to peel away those unwanted layers.
The forecast goes on to say this:
Pluto is now giving you a precious insight into your past. This will yet become the reason why your future starts to look so much more inviting and inspiring.
When those outer layers are gone, there is no doubt that the future does start to look more inviting and inspiring. So start peeling away those layers and expose the you that you really are and can be. It is well worth the work. Believe me.